7 top things anyone who wants to marry should know about getting the 'right' spouse

Marriage is beautiful. YES! but it is only true when you are with the right person.

The divorce rate in our society is on the increase and that’s because people fail to prepare themselves and most times marry for the wrong reasons.
There are higher chances of saving yourself from the heartbreak of going through divorce if you marry your soul mate.
Marriage is a life time commitment and should be taken seriously. Just like other things in life, the saying "if you fail to prepare, then, you have prepared to fail" also applies in marriage.
To make the preparation so much easier, I will share with you the 7 things that I have learnt from successful marriages on how they began the journey in the right step.

1) Prayer This point might seem lame to some people but as a Christian, one thing I've come to know is that if you want something, pray for it. This is very essential as you want to communicate to God yourself about the kind of partner you want. It is also very important to give plenty of time for this. I believe you don't want God to give you a 'crash' spouse so, no 'crash' prayer too. My sweet Dad(RIP), always told tell me to give God at least 5 years to choose a life partner for me if I want to enjoy a happy home. Which means that if you want to marry at 25years, start praying about it at least when you are 20. The more time the better. I can confidently tell you that it worked for my Dad who prayed for 6 years and everyone I know that followed this simple rule.

2) Shun the 'single' behaviour. If you want to get married, you have to show it in your behaviour. You cannot be partying and coming home drunk everyday and still expect to have 10 suitors knocking on your door daily. Even if they do, I don't think they are the responsible type. Your behaviour attracts your kind of person. I have not seen anyone that wants to settle down with a drunk or party freak. If you want to be seen as a wife, behave like one. The same applies to men too. Believe me no responsible woman would like to settle down with such man.

3) Love yourself We all enjoy staying around people that show us love. If you don't love yourself, you can't love another person genuinely. You can't give what you don't have. Learn to love yourself.

4) Know what you want. Donot settle for people that don't have the qualities you want in a life partner during your 'waiting' period. You can afford to do that when you are maybe 17 and want to marry at 25 but not when you are 23 and your target age is 25. If you don't want to marry a smoker, don't be in a relationship with one. If you think that the person will change when you finally marry, then you need to think again because most people don't. My piece of advice is that it's high time you left that relationship. You can only change yourself not others.

5) Don't be desperate. This piece of advice is especially for ladies. Being desperate will only make you fall 'prey' for men. Avoid been tempted to throw yourself around any man because you think you are getting older. Just be yourself, nothing can beat that.

6) Have self respect. The way you treat yourself is the way others are bound to treat you. If you are in a relationship that you are not proud of or don't feel comfortable in, respect yourself enough to leave. Please, donot in any way take any abuse from anyone because you want to get married. Remember not to also force yourself on anyone.

7) Avoid unnecessary competition. Be it with yourself, your friends or the world. It's still best to wait for God's own time than rush into marriage because you think you are getting older or worse still, because all your friends are married. If you rush into marriage without carefully taking your time to know the person you are going to spend the rest of your life with, you will rush out of it.

Marry when you have found your soul mate not when your friends have found theirs.